::: I’m Still Princess Dominique | Tilted Tiara and All | Version 2009 :::

Archive for January 2009

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I’ve learned that people don’t even need a reason to not like you. They don’t. They can look at the way you smile, the way your legs look in a pair of heels, the rhythm you use when you tap your pen against your temple when you’re thinking, the way others respond to you, or the way that you blow your coffee before you take the first sip and instantly think, “oh, she thinks she’s cute”. I think I’m what? Cute? For blowing my coffee? People like that aren’t a trip they’re a vacation and if they leave and never come back that will be too soon for me. When I was younger I used to worry about whatever it was that I supposedly did to “said people” to make them not like me. I would examine myself and try to discover if I was unconsciously acting a certain way, or pursing my lips in an “I’m better than you,” fashion, but the fact is that people who are negative and are dead set on finding something wrong with you, will. That’s their life purpose; to pick at other people because they’re too empty to find enjoyment in themselves or their purposeless lives.

I’ve also observed or been in the midst of women whispering, “unh, here she comes,” and then coo a sweet ‘good morning’ when she passes as if they weren’t digging their nails in her back seconds before. People like this I realize, also love to see you grovel and plead with them to tell them what it is you’ve supposedly done to make them hate you so much. They get off on it, which is why their purpose is to make you think that there’s something wrong with “you” so that they can continuously get off on “you” trying to rectify the situation day after day after day, month after month and year after year. And trust, when I learned that that was their motive, I simply stopped caring about people who sip on hate’s teats.

You will not get your thrills off of me and watch me dance to some imaginary tune you’re playing just to be friends with you, sweetie. My purpose is far beyond that. You want entertainment? Rock of Love Bus, Sober House, Tool Academy, True Beauty and America’s Next Top Model, heck pick one, ’cause I aint it. I’m not talking about friends here, mind you. We all have our ups and downs with those, but rather I’m talking about people who don’t know a thing about you, who probably deep down on the inside would like nothing more than to get to know you better, learn from you, but instead let their shortcomings and insecurities get in the way of them not only never having that chance, but they let their issues get in the way and blind them so completely that they end up living yet never actually having a life of their own either. To that I say, too bad, so sad, goodbye. I would normally file this thought under women; not that men don’t come with their issues too, but definitely not as much as the female persuasion that’s for sure–but I don’t have a “women” category so “life musings” will have to do.

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41

Maybe because it’s happened in the past I look at everything as a possible stalking. Such was my resistence to Twitter. Well that and the fact that I’m a private person with the exception of things I do solely to get the word out about my books and other projects. I mean, I signed up on Facebook with no problem, Myspace too but then when it came to Twitter, the whole “follow me” thing just conjured images of me walking down a dark desolate street and hearing footsteps behind me. I pray I don’t live to regret it. But just in case. Find me on Twitter here. I refuse to say “follow me”. The “would be” stalker can probaby use that in a court of law claiming I asked for it.

bakerycookie

I don’t know where I’ve been but I’m just hearing about this and wanted to share. I am at a loss for word and am 10 seconds from getting on New Jersey transit and make my way to this bakery. I’m so not a passive person. This here is exactly why people need salvation!

“At at a time when any decent baker should have been selling racially harmonious black and white cookies by the truckload, one Greenwich Village bakery popular with celebrities and shows like Sex and the City has outraged neighbors by selling a “Drunken Negro Face” cookie in, um, “honor” of President Obama. A shocked customer tells My Fox NY that Ted Kefalinos, proprietor of Lafayette French Pastry, asked her, “Would you like some drunken negro heads to go with your coffee? They’re in honor of our new president. He’s following in the same path of Abraham Lincoln; he will get his.” Later, her friend stopped by the bakery and said Kefalinos corrected her about the name of the cookies—they’re actually drunken “N-word” cookies. She says the backwards baker then repeated the dark suggestion that, like Lincoln, President Obama “will get what’s coming to him.”

Read the rest of the story and the updates at The Gothamist.com.

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I discovered this pretty pink Hello Kitty Wallpaper online. I couldn’t wait to put it on my desktop. Now all I have to do is rid the desktop of all the clutter and files and images that I pull there when I’m surfing the net to get the full beauty of it. It’s not overwhelming or too frou frou. My husband said, “I guess I can forget using that laptop, it’s yours now.” Why do men back away from Hello Kitty? I mean, it’s not like it demands that you surf in pink and purr or cough up furballs. I told him we’ll share–and I absolutely mean it. Girl Scout’s honor!

stud

I’ve never been a stud or even a rhinestone kind of person. To me it screams 1980’s tacky. No offense to those who love to Bedazzle and still rock sweaters with gold and plastic glass looking beads accented with fringe. It’s just not my thing, but when I saw these boots…oh my, Jesus crack the sky. I’d like to think that I’m a functional person, so, I don’t just go out and buy something just to say I have it. I need a pair of black boots and I need a pair of brown boots. They are basic colors and before I ever buy pink, yellow or green shoes I always make sure I’m locked down with the basic palete colors. Size 8 is in stock. After I have secured them I’ll let you know the stats. I can’t even type I want these so bad. I’m just thankful that I’m not to the point where I need deliverance yet.

peculiar

Sometimes I find myself in very contemplative moods. At times like those I put aside my favorite music and lay still trying think about what’s going on with me and right now I’ve been stuck on happiness and being happy. We all say we want it but can we even define it for ourselves? Am I happy? What is happiness? Is happiness having friends? I don’t remember if when I was young I had an imaginary friend or not. I know that I have had friends in real life who are sometimes imaginary because you wonder if they really exist. They’re never there for you and only call you when “they” are having a crisis and you normally can’t find them when you’re in need of an ear, money, a favor ecetera. I’ve had friends that I rarely heard from when they met a cute guy in a club, started getting sexed on a daily and began little by little moving their stuff into his place, but the phone rang off the hook after midnight once they started discovering his flaws ie. text messages from other girls/women on his cell, unexplained absences from work, earrings in the back seat of his car that weren’t hers and the likes, and that’s just too fair weather for me to even want to be bothered.

Needless to say those are friends I no longer have. I wonder too, is happiness being in love or being loved by someone else? Not sure about that because I’ve been in love before and after your heart gets broken into microscopic pieces, there’s nothing too happy about that. I’ve also met people who have claimed to love me that turned out to be certifiable nuts. Fact is that we are all different and we are made up of so many different things that its hard to say who or what kind of person will be attracted to the different things about us, and when entering into a relationship, like Forest Gump said, “you never know what you’re gonna get.” My history, I’ve gotten nuts. I’ve gotten men who were obsessed with taming, owning, domesticating, manipulating, controlling me or straight up just didn’t support me or want to see me succeed or maybe they were just trying to get another notch on their proverbial belt. I had to revamp myself to keep the nuts at bay. It took years to get that nut residue off of me. Now I’m more in tune with me and what I want or will tolerate and my flashing red “princess signal” (similar to the Bat signal) goes off whenever there’s a crazy approaching.

Being, however, I’ve found is easier for me though, it works for me, being comfortable with who you are and what you’re doing and how you’re moving around in life–that’s what I mean. I found that “me” is all that I have control over so that’s the best place to start for anyone trying to make-over themselves and their life. You can’t change other people. Willing them to change with mental telepathy doesn’t work, rewarding them with sex, dinners and other goodies doesn’t jive either if they aren’t innately ready to change. But you can restructure your life so that you surround yourself only with things that bring you joy and make you happy, and things that you can’t necessarily control, like the girl with the cubicle next to yours who cracks gum all day long–even while on the phone, or the rude woman who cuts you off in traffic and lets go of the wheel to give you both fingers, or the waitress that brings you a dirty water glass and doesn’t care because she’s not drinking it, you just decide to make a conscious choice on how you let it affect you.

Fact is, I’ve had to cut friends out of my life, lovers too, which is unfortunate, but again, necessary because I’ve realized that my well being is more important to me than worrying about how badly they’ll talk about me afterwards. “Being” is what truly is happiness to me because its a choice that no one else can make it for me. Being honest, being giving, being friendly, being forgiving, being true to my beliefs, being a nurturer, being able to laugh out loud without fearing disapproval, being truly content with finding something I absolutely adore on sale, being able to pay full price for something just because I want it, being able to cry when I’m happy, being able to remove myself from an uncomfortable situation without feeling bad about it, being able to travel at will, being able to wish and dream, being able to write the stories in my heart without worrying if every reader will “get” it, being able to trust people until they give me a reason not to, being able to not beat myself up when those same people I trusted prove to be untrustworthy, being a great listener, being pleased with my shortlist of close personal friends and the fun things we have and will do together. Happiness for me is “being” and my ways of being I’m pleased to say, are all choices that “I” have made and will continue to make because that’s how I define happiness–it works for me and I’m sure it will continue to. They say that you learn something new everyday and by far, how to be happy for “me” is the best thing I’ve learned on this planet yet.

update

I didn’t actually cry yesterday but I did get misty a few times. Just watching the first family walking and proceeding to the area where the Inauguration would be held was enough to remind me of a time when the hate wouldn’t have let little brown babies anywhere near the White House. Michelle looked flawless in Isabel Toledo. Her ensemble was effortless, not like she spent hours quick-changing to find the perfect outfit. They are calling her “the new sexy“. The little girls looked prettier than Easter Sunday when you get to wear all of your brand spankin’ new stuff. Barack was serene. There is something to be said for someone who can be as calm as he is with the weight of the U.S. that they can’t wait to foist on his shoulders as if “he” created it. But all in all like I said on Facebook, I’m elated that I finally I get to experience something that I could live firsthand instead of relying on someone else’s misconstrued interpretation in a text book. That’s what’s real. Now, on to lighter thoughts, I wonder what they’re having for breakfast?


I'm Linda "Princess Dominique" Grosvenor and I'm is a published author and have been writing online for over 15 years. I'm a former student of the Fashion Institute of Technology. I've been called a savvy cocktail of fashion and relationship advice and I've written for and contributed to articles for publications such as Honey, Modern Bride and MORE Magazine. This website will have more of a relationship slant and will be updated rather infrequently. With that said, enjoy!

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